God Wired Us for Love: What Science and Faith Reveal About the Secret to a Happy Life

God’s Creation Is Divinely Intentional

I’m always in awe when I reflect on the harmony and intentionality of God’s creation—it’s breathtaking. From the intricate design of the human body to the vastness of the universe, everything reflects divine intelligence.

Take the human brain: it’s not a static organ but one that constantly adapts. From early childhood, it trims away weaker neural connections while strengthening those used most often. This makes its 86 billion neurons a highly efficient network shaped by what matters most to each unique person.

Or consider a forest. To the untrained eye, it may seem like a random grouping of trees. But in reality, it’s a finely tuned ecosystem. Trees communicate through underground fungal networks (mycorrhizal fungi), sharing nutrients, warning each other of pests, and even supporting weaker or younger trees.

This divine orchestration is everywhere: “The heavens declare the glory of God; the skies proclaim the work of his hands.” – Psalm 19:1

In the same way, God designed us so that we are never truly and deeply happy unless we are in a loving relationship with him and extend that love to others.

 What Makes Us Happy?

Each year, during the Confirmation class my wife and I teach, I ask the teens to imagine themselves at 40 years old and to picture themselves as truly happy. Then I ask them to describe what that life looks like and why they feel so fulfilled. Most describe lives filled with fame, career success, wealth, and travel. Some include achieving success in their passions, such as becoming a soccer star or a professional musician. Only a few mention faith or close relationships with family and friends as sources of happiness.

We often confuse fleeting pleasures with lasting happiness. But science and faith both tell a more profound truth.

The Harvard Study on Happiness

The longest-running scientific study on happiness and well-being is the Harvard Study of Adult Development, led by Dr. Robert Waldinger and Dr. Marc Schulz. Begun in 1938, it followed both Harvard students and inner-city youth, later expanding to include their descendants.

After decades of data, the study’s conclusion is clear: strong, loving relationships are the single most important predictor of long-term happiness. People who have meaningful connections with family, friends, and community are healthier, happier, and live longer. I would add that our relationship with God is the most essential of all the relationships. No matter how beautiful, wealthy, or accomplished someone is, without deep and meaningful love—especially divine love—something remains missing.

This study debunks several common myths:

• Myth: Success leads to happiness
  Truth: Strong relationships lead to both success and happiness.
• Myth: Wealth buys well-being
  Truth: Beyond meeting basic needs, money does not bring lasting joy.
• Myth: Happiness is an individual pursuit
  Truth: Happiness is deeply relational and communal.

God wired us for love. Quality relationships—not the number of friends, but the depth of connection—are what matter most. These bonds protect us from stress and promote health and well-being.

“God is love, and whoever remains in love remains in God and God in him.” – 1 John 4:16

The Blue Zones Study

Another powerful study is the Blue Zones project, led by Dan Buettner, a National Geographic Fellow. He studied five regions where people live significantly longer and healthier lives, often reaching 100 years or more.

The original Blue Zones:

1. Okinawa, Japan
2. Sardinia, Italy
3. Nicoya Peninsula, Costa Rica
4. Ikaria, Greece
5. Loma Linda, California (a Seventh-day Adventist community)

The Study identified key lifestyle habits in all Blue Zones:

• Natural movement
  Instead of structured gym time, they move constantly—gardening, walking to buy food, tending animals, and climbing hills due to their environments.
• Positive outlook
  They maintain a strong faith, a clear sense of purpose, and regular rest. Attending faith-based services four times a month was associated with 4–14 extra years of life expectancy.
• Healthy diet
  They eat mostly plant-based foods, practice moderation, and enjoy 1–2 small glasses of wine per day.
• Belonging and connection
  Perhaps most importantly, they have strong, daily social ties with family and community.

Examples of loving, communal living:

• Okinawa: Elderly women form lifelong “moai” support groups, committing to mutual care.
• Sardinia: Extended families live close together and value intergenerational bonds.
• Loma Linda: Faith communities offer strong support and shared Sabbath rituals.

Once again, the takeaway is clear: God wired us to thrive through love and connection.

Jesus and the Church Have Always Taught This

Jesus himself modeled this communal love. While he often withdrew to pray alone, he spent most of his time in deep relationships. He traveled with his apostles and other disciples, such as Mary Magdalene. He formed close friendships with Peter, James, John, and with Mary, Martha, and Lazarus. He shared meals, attended weddings, and joined in celebrations—even with those considered outcasts.

“No longer do I call you servants... I have called you friends.” – John 15:15 

Jesus taught that the greatest commandment is to love God with all our heart, soul, mind, and strength—and to love others as he loves us.

The Church affirms this truth:

“The human person needs to live in society... Through the exchange with others, mutual service, and dialogue with his brethren, man develops his potential.” —Catechism of the Catholic Church 1879

And the Second Vatican Council reminds us:

“Man cannot fully find himself except through a sincere gift of himself.” —Gaudium et Spes 24

The True Secret to Happiness

Wealth and fame can be tools for good, but they often become idols. We chase them hoping they’ll satisfy our hearts—but they can’t. Indeed, true and lasting happiness comes from loving God and others unconditionally.

“If we have no peace, it is because we have forgotten that we belong to each other.”
—St. Teresa of Calcutta